Moms who Suffer in the Dark
Every since I was a little girl my mom has been my hero, my greatest inspiration, my greatest support system, and undoubtedly the strongest woman I know. I’ve seen her go out of her way just to make sure that everyone else was o.k even when she, herself, was suffering. I’ve seen her lay hands on the sick, praying that they would recover even when she, herself, was in need of a miracle. I’ve seen her smile through pain, extend grace when it was difficult, and remain faithful in the times when it was the most challenging.
That’s the beauty of a mom…being able to persevere under pressure!
But what about the mom who’s finding it difficult to persevere under pressure? What about the mom who’s suffering in the dark? What about the mom who’s biggest challenge is just being able to get out of the bed in the morning?
As I often think about all of the sacrifices my mom made for me over the years I couldn’t help but to think about the mom who’s suffering in the dark.
She’s the mom who’s secretly overwhelmed by motherhood but hides behind a smile. She’s the mom who’s secretly battling low self esteem but she hides behind the mask of success. She’s the mom who’s afraid to fail so she hides behind the mask of the “perfect mom”. She’s the mom who wants nothing more than to just be free. Free to be imperfect. Free to have flaws. Free to take a long nap without feeling guilty. Free to order take out for dinner without feeling like a bad mom. Free to admit that she’s struggling without feeling like a failure. Free to live! Free to just be free!
Today, I want to encourage the mom who’s suffering in the dark. I want to let you know that it really is o.k NOT to be ok. It really is o.k NOT to be the perfect mom. It really is o.k NOT to do everything right. It really is o.k NOT to have it all together. Jesus died so that you might be free. Free from guilt. Free from shame. Free from low self esteem. Free from the standards of the world. Free from living life behind the mask. He died to give you courage. He died to give you peace. You don’t have to suffer in the dark alone. There’s a God who wants nothing more than to love you back to life. I know life can get overwhelmingly busy at times but there’s a God who wants nothing more than to be your peace.
We so often admire the strength of a mom but let’s not forget about the mom who’s finding it difficult to be strong. Let’s not forget about the mom who’s suffering in the dark.
Here are three things that we can do to encourage the mom who’s suffering in the dark:
1. Tell her how great of a mom she is inspite of her flaws
Every mom wants to be told that she’s doing a great job. The mom who’s suffering in the dark’s greatest fear is that she’s not living up to the expectations of those around her. When she does a great job even in the little things congratulate her and tell her how great she is.
2. Give her room to grow
Never make her feel like she has to have it all together right away. Let her know that it’s o.k not to have the house cleaned and dinner on the table by 5pm every evening. Constantly remind her that just because this is where she is right now doesn’t mean that this is where she’s going to always be. Give her room to grow.
3. Give her time to herself
This is the area that most moms struggle with. As women (especially moms) it’s just in our nature to place everyone and everything else above ourselves but remind her that it’s o.k to rest and take care of herself. Support her by taking the kids for a weekend and allowing her to just be free to rest. Give her time to herself.
If you’re a mom who’s suffering in the dark I pray that after reading this you’re encouraged, inspired, and most importantly that you gain the courage to just be free.
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Let's continue to lift up our sisters!